If Ever I Loved You

If Ever I Loved You

If ever I loved you, ’twas not in vain.

Love is not wasted, it waxes and wanes.

Sometimes toxic, given in haste-

infected, it dies, soon laid to waste.

Lust, hypnotizing, too often

thought thus,

masquerading as Love did I

innocently trust

the face behind the mask.

If ever I loved you ’twas not in error.

Love’s path strewn with roses, surrounded by terror-

titillation, invigoration, transformation!

One does not find

who fears to seek,

questions unanswered 

by one too meek

to ask.

If ever I loved you

in haste, waste or kind,

the mind sees clearly

as the heart remains blind.

Pebbles skipped o’er a lake

sink to the muddy floor,

to rest like moldy bones,

locked behind a door.

The key kept in a sacred place,

the lines of pain etched on my face,

hiding ‘neath the smile I wear-

look closely and you’ll see it there.

When I, so weary I cannot grin,

 will go to the lake and peer within

to ponder on

the Wisdom Stones,

to rattle the bones-

my treasure, the measure

of my journey……